One Minute Movie Review: Mirror Mirror

A decidedly strange little movie, think Tim Burton on Xanax. The director of the Immortals, yes, that is exactly what I said, brings us an entirely different take on the most recognizable fairy tale in the Brother's Grimms' library of fantasy and fable. Mixing Broadway style costumes, sharp and contemporary humor, and a distinctive spin on the twice told tale, Tarsem Singh gives us a surreal and plastic flick that does not quite succeed or fail, just puzzle. Roberts is delicious as the evil queen, but, quickly, overplays the part.  Lilly Collins, from the movie Priest, again, yes that is exactly what I said, plays sweet, sappy, and pure to a point of gooey nausea.  Lane is predictable, and I was literally waiting for him to spontaneous break out into Hakuna Matata, which would have made his part entertaining. Depsite it's shortcomings, hah, hah, It is the ensemble of performers who play the seven dwarves that truly steal the show, and rightfully so. Their interactions with every character, in every scene, are an engaging and exciting and solely save this film from biting the poison apple. The script is Saturday Morning fare, with little substance and lavish style. Add in a weirdly misplaced but strangely appropriate Bollywood ending and you have one of the most confusing and chaotic concoctions in modern cinema. Kudos to Singh for trying something new with something antique.  However, he shot too highly, tried too hard, and ended up with H.R Pufnstuf for yuppies. 2 out of 5 Kernels: A for imagination, C for delivery, and F as in what the F did I just sit through.