#JustaQuickiePlease: The Hitman's Bodyguard Review

Deadpool and Nick Fury kill a bunch of people while setting a new record for the sheer number of times the word MotherF@$ker is used.  Oh, and Wade is dating Elektra, can't fail to mention that.  Now you have an exact idea of what this movie is.  Fun, funny, action-packed, without offering an iota of an excuse for its gratuitous violence, profanity, and shenanigans (oh, how I love using that word), this has all the style and substance of a wild rollercoaster ride, without attempting to be anything more or less.   Reynolds is unashamedly, well Reynolds; Jackson is Jackson, Oldman becomes every villain he has ever portrayed, and Hayek plays her role, so, over the top, it defies gravity.  With all that said, it works; predictably, shallowly, and shamelessly designed to entertain and thrill and not a thing more.  It is, quite simply, simple; designed to challenge the limits of every stuntman involved and blow up as much crap as possible, with the only standard being, that they capture, precisely, each and every the slow-motion walk away.   Translation, it is a testosterone filled joy ride in a rocket car.   Bonus, look for an absolutely subtle yet obvious nod to Ryan's man-crush, Jackman towards the end.  3 out of 5 Kernels; I truly believe Reynolds is the Merc with the Mouth and just makes these movies to pay the bills in between spandex wearing gigs.