Monday, June 22, 2015
#JustaQuickiePlease: Jurassic World Review
The good news, it's not as bad as JP3, unfortunately, that is where the good news ends. As far as prequels, or, in this case, quadquels go (just made up a new word there) this is a Jurassic sized fail! If you want to see an excessive CGI spectacle, and pony up the thirteen plus dollars for it, this is the flick for you. If you demand solid acting, a plausible plot, or any form of unpredictability, then avoid this like a T-Rex in heat. And this is coming from the quintessential Pratt fanboy who firmly believes Star-Lord needs to keep this cinematic faux pas-asaurus off his resume. This story doesn't jump the shark it leaps over the plesiosaurus like Superman on Meth. And, to think, they were worried that a human/dino hybrid story would be a silly plotline, at least that would have been more original and believable. All of the authenticity of character development, wide-eyed wonder, and refreshing creativity from the first installment has been completely diluted as this dino dynasty unremarkably continues. I mean at this point, someone has to realize making prehistoric pups is a really bad idea, right! To believe that level of ignorance is possible, let alone plausible, requires any common sense to become quickly extinct. However, the movie is making millions, so it is obvious to me that sadly there is a legitimate public appetite for mounds of dino dung as long as it is computer generated and hyped up enough. 0 out of 5 Kernels: for the love of all that is holy, let this franchise go the way of the dinosaurs it continually disgraces.